Sigyn was barely old enough to remember the great Æsir-Vanir War. But remember she did. Every last gory image was imprinted on her mind, though she did try hard to forget it all. Things would have been a lot simpler if her mind had chosen to block it all out.

When the people of Vanaheimr had refused to become one with Asgardia, the Æsir had become in accordance with a strange and unusual vow. They set upon destroying everything that had the mark of the Vanir. Clothing was cut to pieces and cast away, gold and silver was thrown into the river, the breastplates of the men were hacked to pieces, and great halls were torn down. The trappings of the horses were broken up, the horses themselves drowned in whirlpools, and the Vanir – men and women alike – with nooses around their necks hung from the trees - expressions of pure terror still etched upon their faces. The point was complete annihilation of Vanheimr. Thus, there was no treasure for the victors, and no mercy for the vanquished.

anniephantom:

labirdgeoiseed:

this is my favorite goofy pun ever, I have told it at least five times

I don’t care, fuck you

okay ready

as you all know, saint patrick walked barefoot as an act of contrition, which made his feet rugged and blistered. he ate an ascetic’s diet, which made him weak and additionally gave him bad breath.

all of this made him

a super-calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis

oh my god

(via a-dream-is-reality)